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tv   Late Night With Seth Meyers  NBC  March 21, 2015 12:36am-1:38am PDT

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♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: hey, everybody. before we say good-bye, i just want to mention your podcast -- we have a new podcast coming out. >> steve: yes. >> jimmy: it's april -- >> 16th tomorrow. >> jimmy: oh? >> no, that's not tomorrow. it's called tomorrow. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: very confusing. so tomorrow do not look for this podcast. >> no. but april 15th look for it. >> jimmy: and it's like what? serial, jinx, murder? >> i killed them all. >> jimmy: there you go right there. my thanks to jeremy piven, ariana grande, joshua topolsky, andy summers! [ cheers and applause ] and the roots right there, ladies and gentlemen. stay tuned for late night with seth meyers. thank you for watching. have a great weekend. see you next week.
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bye-bye, everybody! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> announcer: from 30 rockefeller plaza in tonight -- kelly ripa, the creator of "empire", lee daniels, music from echosmith, featuring the 8g band with fred armisen and kate pierson. ♪ [ cheers and applause ] and now, here he is, seth meyers! ♪
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[ cheers and applause ] >> seth: good evening, everybody! i'm seth meyers. this is "late night." how are you all doing tonight? [ cheers and applause ] good to hear. well, it's monday. the weekend just ended. did anyone else here spend their weekend watching "house of cards"? [ cheers ] yeah. because the third season of "house of cards" premiered on netflix this weekend. there was corruption, deceit, and betrayal and that was just me canceling plans so i could watch it. [ laughter ] yeah, dave, i can't make it. my grandmother died. oh, she died all right. [ laughter ] in 1997. but that's the thing about dave, he'll believe anything. [ laughter and applause ] i had no idea a camera was going to be there. that was just dumb luck. [ laughter ] sometimes you get super lucky in show -- we have cameras everywhere, but i had no idea there was one
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specifically -- you know, elections, a lot of talk about the 2016 election. jeb bush told an audience this weekend that he is not familiar with the ways of washington, despite being related to two presidents. but, in his defense, one of them wasn't familiar with the ways of washington either. so, i don't know where he would have learned it. [ laughter and applause ] new study, you guys. we get very excited when new studies come out. according to a new study, north korea has the smallest penis size in the world with an average of 3.8 inches. [ laughter ] but their biggest dick is 5'9". [ cheers and applause ] hey, greg, get in here. we want you to go work on this new study.
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oh, awesome, i'm always up for a new study. grab your ruler. you're going to north korea. [ laughter ] this is always exciting. the latest ranking of the world's richest billionaires came out this morning. bill gates came in first with $79.2 billion. i feel bad for him. can you imagine having that much money and you still don't have an iphone 6? [ laughter ] it's sad, just sad. [ applause ] everybody, happy birthday to jon bon jovi who turned 53 today. [ cheers and applause ] jon bon jovi is 53, so these days the steel horse he rides is his hip. [ laughter ] they didn't care for the jon bon jovi joke. but that's okay. we can probably edit it out. [ laughter and applause ]
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this is interesting. boston university is offering a harry potter themed sex ed class. and students are hoping to learn the spell clitoris findakiss. [ laughter and applause ] taco bell. you guys ever heard of taco bell? yeah. [ cheers ] that's good, because they spend a lot on marketing. so, i'm glad. taco bell is testing a new product called cap'n crunch delights, which are balls of sweet dough covered in crushed cap'n crunch cereal and filled with a milk icing. you know, mexican food. [ laughter ] run for the border, i guess? [ applause ] and finally, another new study. according to a new study, only 6% of men actually need extra large condoms. only 6% of men actually need
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extra large condoms. or as i call them, relaxed fit. [ laughter ] ladies and gentlemen, this is the 8g band. ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> seth: hey, everybody. how are we doing over there, 8g band? it's so good to see you. and everybody, we have a special guest sitting in with the 8g band all this week. you know her from the legendary band the b-52s. now, she has an amazing album of her own, "guitars and microphones." please welcome, kate pierson. how are you, kate? [ cheers and applause ] >> i'm good. >> seth: so, so, so happy you're here. fred, i'm always so happy you're here. did you have a wonderful weekend? >> fred: great, yeah. >> seth: that's good. and fred, you know, i'm always so fascinated, especially on a monday, because i feel as though you accomplish so much in the days i don't see you. the only thing that worries me
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is with all your accomplishments, i am sometimes concerned people are watching at home and they think you might be making up the answer to these questions off the top of your head. but i know, as a friend, that you wouldn't do that. you know what i mean? like, why would you lie to me? [ laughter ] well, anyways, we were talking about "house of cards" and i heard -- is this true? that you just sold a series to netflix that you say is so thrilling and so captivating that people will have no choice but to binge-watch the entire series the second they sit down. is this true that you sold a show like this to netflix? >> fred: it's true. >> seth: that's so exciting. >> fred: yeah. [ laughter ] >> seth: so, tell me about this show. >> fred: this is called "house of pinecones." [ laughter ] and it's a house with shelves and shelves of pinecones dried out on display of all different sizes, just displayed throughout the rooms. "house of pinecones." [ laughter ] >> seth: okay. so, now what part of is this is captivating? why -- so, if i watch an episode, what am i seeing? and a follow-up question, why do
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i then want to watch the next one? >> fred: because what happens is you think you've seen all the rooms, then all of a sudden, at the end of the episode, you see a little bit of another room. [ laughter ] but not enough for you to see the whole thing, just like a little bit. you're like, wait, what was in there? and then next week, it's like oh, then you see the rest of that room. then you think, okay, this is done. this is it. i've seen the whole house. then -- you know, and on and on it goes. [ laughter ] >> seth: but at no point is it not a room full of pine cones? >> fred: well, i'm not going to give that away. [ laughter and applause ] >> seth: "house of pinecones" available on netflix. congratulations, fred. i'm so excited. >> fred: thank you. [ cheers and applause ] >> seth: so, the last few weeks we have been talking about a charity event i'm involved with called cycle for survival. it's an amazing fundraiser for rare cancer research at memorial sloan-kettering. i'll be riding with my team, team seth, this sunday at equinox here in new york city. and that only gives me a few more days to fundraise. here is the thing. i really want, i desperately want to be the top fundraising
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team this year. and currently standing in my way is perry zimmerman. let's show you a picture of perry. this is me and perry. perry is 14. she is a three-time cancer survivor. for the last two years, she has raised the most money. team perry has been the top fundraiser. now, i've been asking for your help, because i want to knock perry off her high horse. [ laughter ] i want that. now, let's take a look at how fundraising is going. so, here's where we started. let's see where we are now. okay. so -- [ laughter and applause ] i realized i made a mistake and i realized what the problem is. you have only seen -- i have only shown you a picture of perry and in a picture, she looks all cute and adorable. but you're not seeing the real perry, the cocky disingenuous perry that i know. so, in order for you to get a sense of who she really is, i reached out and perry sent us this video message. let's take a look. >> hey, everyone. i'm so happy that so many of you are donating. and remember, it doesn't matter who raises the most money.
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what matters is that together we can find a cure. thank you. [ applause ] >> seth: i mean, right? [ laughter ] i mean, you see it now, right? she's a huge phony. [ laughter ] please, guys, please, please, help me beat her. to donate to me, a genuine down-to-earth television personality, go to this link. and to donate to perry, a two-faced, stab-you-in-the-back sham, go to this link. you can also donate at and at thank you. and together, together, we can beat perry. [ cheers and applause ] we've got a great show for you tonight. the lovely kelly ripa is here. also stopping by, creator of the monster hit show "empire", lee daniels will be joining us. and we'll have music from echosmith. [ cheers and applause ] so, another thing that happened
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this weekend is that the internet exploded thursday night on what at first-look seemed to be a normal photo of a dress. but soon turned into a heated debate on what color the dress actually was. some saw white and gold. others saw blue and black. tonight, we try to get to the bottom of this story in a segment we call "a closer look." ♪ [ cheers and applause ] all right. joining us first from the university of new mexico is dr. paul matler, a neuroscientist. >> thank you for having me, seth. >> seth: so, doctor, talk us through the science of what happened here. >> well, you see, seth, light enters the eye through the lens. different wavelengths correspond to different colors. the light hits the retina in the back of the eye where pigments fire up neural connections to the visual cortex. now, if your cortex is damaged in any way, it renders you, what we in the field call, a visual dumb-dumb. in which case, you would look at this photo and say, "duh, that's white and gold." [ laughter ] >> seth: so, it seems like you're being a little hard on
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the white and gold crowd. >> not hard, seth, sympathetic. imagine going through life seeing everything wrong. would you believe there are people who don't think that i look like a young george clooney? [ light laughter ] >> seth: i don't think you do. >> well, what color did you think the dress was? >> seth: white and gold. >> well, there you have it. you're severely brain damaged. >> seth: the dress led to arguments not only online, but in homes across the country. joining us now are married couple pat and david mcafee. welcome. so, what did you guys think when you saw the dress? >> well, i immediately said, "that dress is blue and black." and then, i showed it to david and he said -- >> this is stupid. i don't care about this. [ laughter and applause ] >> so, i reminded him that dr. lieber told us that one of the keys to a marriage is engaging in the things that aren't necessarily interesting to us, but which are interesting
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to our spouse. >> so, i said, "fine, i'll tell you what color i think it is if you promise we don't have to talk about this any more." >> and i said, "i'm not asking you to clean the garage here, david. i'm just asking you what color the dress is." >> so i said, "fine, it's orange." >> and i said, "are you [ bleep ] kidding me?" [ laughter ] >> which led me to say, "this is why i didn't want to answer!" >> and then i started to worry. because if he thinks that dress is orange, then there's a good chance he has no idea his wife is black. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] >> what? [ laughter ] >> seth: the dress, the dress was worn at a wedding by the mother of the bride. joining us now is the bridesmaid from the wedding, sasha allen. >> hi, seth. >> seth: so, sasha, as someone who was actually at the wedding, are you surprised at all the attention the dress has been getting? >> no, but i'm surprised by which dress is getting all the attention. >> seth: okay, so, what do you mean?
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>> no matter what color that dress was, the mother of the bride chose to wear it. while me and the rest of the bridesmaids had to wear dresses picked out by the bride that were tragic. >> seth: i'm sorry? >> you know what color my dress was? magenta. you know what magenta is, seth? it's pink for psychos. it's what hookers wear to prom. no one looks good in magenta. and it's like i get it, shannon, today is your day and you get to look the best, but i'm still single! i need to meet someone! you won, shannon. be a good winner. don't make me wear magenta! where am i supposed to find my husband? >> would you be interested in a young george clooney? >> sure. do you know one? [ laughter ] >> ah, a white and golder. severely brain damaged. >> seth: all right. thank you to all of our guests. that was "a closer look." we'll be right back with more "late night."
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only at subway. is the naturally refreshing way to enjoy your meals. it's the flavour we all savour, does any food a favor... you gotta be (ah) more (ah) tea! tea-riffic! lipton. be more tea. and now try iced tea in a squeeze. and i quit smoking iwith chantix. i told myself for so long that i needed to quit smoking. i would quit then i'd go right back to it. chantix absolutely helped me quit smoking. along with support, chantix (varenicline) is proven to help people quit smoking. chantix helped reduce my urge to smoke. some people had changes in behavior, thinking or mood, hostility, agitation, depressed mood and suicidal thoughts or actions while taking or after stopping chantix. some people had seizures while taking chantix. if you have any of these, stop chantix and call your doctor right away. tell your doctor about any history of mental health problems, which could get worse while taking chantix or history of seizures. don't take chantix if you've had a serious allergic or skin reaction to it. if you develop these, stop chantix and see your doctor right away as some can be life-threatening. tell your doctor if you have a history of heart or blood vessel problems, or develop new or worse symptoms.
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get medical help right away if you have symptoms of a heart attack or stroke. decrease alcohol use while taking chantix. use caution when driving or operating machinery. common side effects include nausea, trouble sleeping and unusual dreams. i'm not worried about smoking my next cigarette. to me that feels great. ask your doctor if chantix is right for you. what's the best room in the living room, of course. that's where life happens. but sometimes life can be a little messy. that's why there's pledge. pledge helps make living rooms look beautiful. we love that, and we love living rooms. gotta get that bacon! yummy, crunchy, bacon bacon bacon there in that bag! who wants a beggin' strip? me! i'd get it myself, but i don't have thumbs! mmm mmm mmm mmm mmm it's beggin'! mmm, i love you. (announcer) beggin' strips...there's no time like beggin' time. we take great care with what goes into our chalice. only maize, hops, barley... and water. and because water is so important to us,
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we've partnered with to help those who don't have access to it. each limited edition chalice provides five years of clean drinking water to women in the developing world. ♪ ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> seth: welcome back. now quick question, do you guys
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read the news? yes, no, yeah? [ cheers ] okay. great. well, i found that i don't know if you do this, too, but a lot of times i'll just read the headline and the first couple paragraphs of an article, get the gist and then i'll just move on to the next one. but the truth is there's really valuable information if you read all the way until the end of an article. let me show you what i'm talking about in a segment we call "last line of a news story." ♪ [ applause ] okay, let's get started with some tech news. apple car reportedly ready for the road by 2020. okay, so first couple paragraphs talk about how apple is seriously considering going to the automobile business. but let's see what we'd learn if we read all the way to the end. according to apple ceo tim cook, the icar one will have an engine, a steering wheel, and a gas pedal. [ laughter ] the following year, with the release of the icar two, a windshield will be added. [ laughter ] and after a wave of car accidents, apple fans will eagerly line up around the block for the icar three, which will
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finally have brakes. [ laughter and applause ] wow. do you guys see what you miss if you don't read all the way to the end? turning to political news -- obama's approval rating stagnant despite economy. okay, so the article explains that even though the unemployment rate is at pre-recession level and the stock market is experiencing record highs, a majority of americans still disapprove of the president's handling of the economy. let's check out the last line of the news story. when reached for comment, a visibly tired president obama sighed, began rubbing his temples, and after a few seconds of silence, says "59,875,203. 59,875,202. 59 million -- oh, sorry, i should explain. sometimes to relax i just start counting down the number of seconds until i can stop being president of you ungrateful fully-insured, job-having bin laden-free brats." [ applause ] next up, here's some interesting news from the world of gaming. museum to create video game hall of fame. apparently a museum in rochester is going to open a video game
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hall of fame with the first induction scheduled for june. let's go down to the last line of the story. "finally, and i know this will be unpopular," said museum curator phillip markenson, "but despite posting hall of fame worthy numbers throughout their careers, mario and luigi will have very little chance of getting inducted due to their brazen use of performance enhancing mushrooms." [ laughter and applause ] too bad for those guys. it's a real bummer. let's check out my favorite kind of news, space news! [ cheers ] i though this story was interesting. buzz aldrin urges u.s. to establish colony on mars. okay, so as you know, buzz aldrin was the second man to walk on the moon. he's saying that america must commit to establishing a colony on mars. let's check out the last line of the news story. "let me be clear, we have to do this for real," aldrin said at the end of his testimony. "it can't be fake like the moon landing." [ applause ] and finally, turning to my favorite news, kosher news -- company plans to sell kosher marijuana in new york. let's go to the last line of the news story -- when reached for comment, rabbi joseph himlesteen of
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congregation emmanuel israel said, "you know what's a funny word? shabbat. it sort of sounds like a jewish frog. shabbat. shabbat." [ laughter ] shabbat. [ laughter ] shabbat, it's fun. [ applause ] that's "last line of the news story." we'll be right back with kelly ripa. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ [brad] imagine a place where you can not only find everything you need,but you can get it instantly. and anywhere. presenting the new apartments-dot-com. or as i call it: the apartminternet. connected.synergistic.thought- leading. it's a whole-new paradigm in looking for an apartment. it's all here. more apartments than you can find
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♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> seth: welcome back, everybody. our first guest tonight is an emmy-award winning television host, whom you can see each morning on "live with kelly and michael." please welcome back to the show the lovely kelly ripa. [ cheers and applause ] ♪
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>> seth: hi. >> hi. >> seth: yeah, you weren't here on this set, right? >> no, this is fancy. >> seth: not bad, right? >> you redecorated. >> seth: yeah. >> that must mean ratings are good, what. >> seth: oh, well, that's what they say, yeah. >> yeah, that's nice. >> seth: that's what they say. they made me build the desk by hand though, so that was their -- yeah. [ laughter ] >> oh, well okay, well, that's okay. >> seth: yeah, that's okay. >> cut costs somewhere. >> seth: you were -- i have to ask, because you were at the oscars. >> i was. >> seth: and you were physically on the premises in maybe the best possible place. you were just off stage. >> yeah, you know what's amazing is that -- you guys, so, when you see the people leave the stage, they're walking off with their awards. you go, where do they go? they go right backstage and i'm standing there behind this little red curtain. and the funny thing about celebrities who have just won an academy award, they are so happy to see you. >> seth: right. >> and they will tell you anything you ask them. >> seth: oh, because everything's down. their guards are down, yeah. >> yeah, they're guards are down. they've just won an academy award. i've given them a glass of champagne, which is probably the first thing they've had to eat all day. >> seth: right. >> and they are so happy to see me.
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they're like, "i'm going to do your show tomorrow, first thing in the morning." >> seth: oh, right. >> yeah. >> seth: because you turn it around and you do a show at 6:00 a.m. >> 6:00 a.m., l.a. time. >> seth: l.a. time, so the next morning. and now, what percentage of those people that win an academy award and they see you and they say, "i want to do your show," how many of them actually show up? >> so, it's happened twice that they've actually showed up. >> seth: okay, gotcha. >> yeah, yeah, twice. >> seth: so only two times ever. >> only two times has that actually -- but they all say they're coming. so we prepare for like 30 people. but we've had two. [ laughter ] two really good people. >> seth: i can imagine, though, you win, saying that you immediately, you walk off, you go, wait a second, i don't want to do a talk show at 6:00 in the morning. >> i don't want to do a talk show. >> seth: i want to drink all night. >> that's what i say, and i'm the one hosting. >> seth: i want asleep cradling this like a baby. >> yeah, of course. >> seth: i don't want to wake up and do chit-chat. but, you have a full audience, right? >> we have a full audience. it's kind of amazing, because i'm always amazed that we can get anybody to come to our audience and it's an entire full house. and they've been waiting since 1:00 in the morning to be like
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loaded into the studio. >> seth: oh, my goodness. >> i know, guys, we're not worth it. it's not worth it. [ laughter ] nothing, you know. >> seth: and now, what percentage of them, do you think, are doing crystal meth? [ laughter ] >> oh my god, that's a good question. >> seth: yeah. >> you know what, they all look so beautiful and they seem very lucid. i mean. >> seth: yeah, classic meth. [ laughter ] >> i would say zero percent. i'm saying zero percent. >> seth: now, the hardest working guy in show business, neil patrick harris -- >> neil patrick harris. >> seth: he actually showed up at 6:00 in the morning. he is one of the nice people, i can't believe it. >> he is, yeah. he was the host of the academy awards this year. he was amazing. >> seth: yeah, did a great job. [ applause ] >> what's so funny about neil, and for those of you who like know him and he seems to be everywhere, and he really is like a bona fide magician. he would come backstage and check on me in the middle of everything and say, "how's it going? are you okay? do you need anything?" and i would say "just go, go, go. go, go! host the show, don't worry about me back here. i'm fine." >> seth: that's like, one thing when you host a dinner party,
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you're supposed to check in on people. when you're hosting the oscars, you don't have to say, "how's everybody's drinks? is everybody's drinks good? did you all get canapés?" >> yeah, right exactly. that's what he was doing. he was amazing. >> seth: the consummate host. >> yeah, and so i -- we went to all the parties afterwards together. and then i basically held him by the hand and we walked back into the studio and he's like, "seems like i was just here a few minutes ago." and we put down our tequilas on the rocks and went out and did the show. >> seth: really? >> it was crazy. >> seth: i don't know if you watch your show, could you tell? would the inquiring eye be able to tell that you were still drunk? >> i don't know. i mean, i think that we go on the air enough days of a week still drunk anyway, so -- [ laughter ] >> seth: right, so you hide it. it just blends together. >> it reads like just, oh it must be monday! >> seth: right. hey, it's crazy monday. [ laughter ] >> monday, she's acting drunk again. >> seth: when you aren't backstage do you like watching awards shows? >> i don't know how celebrities do it, because i like watching the red carpet. i like to see what people are wearing. i think a lot of people do, but
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after a while it gets a little, i don't know, it seems redundant. i don't really love it as much as -- i mean there just seems to be too many awards shows building up to the academy awards. >> seth: well, that with the oscars especially, because i feel like there's so many that now you can almost run analytics based on the nine awards shows that have come before the oscars and say this person is definitely going to win. this person's definitely going to win. there's so few surprises. >> so few surprises and the fact that there was an awards show the day before the awards show. the day before the academy awards. >> seth: that was the spirit awards, right? our friend, fred hosted, the day before. >> fred, i mean the day before. >> fred: i'm sorry. >> seth: day before. [ laughter ] >> fred: i'm sorry. >> seth: it's the oscars. they're trying to do the oscars. the day before. >> fred: i'm sorry, i'm sorry. >> seth: just the day before. >> fred: i'm sorry. >> seth: did you not know? did you not know about the oscars? >> fred: no, i had no idea. [ laughter ] >> seth: okay, well that's fine. i apologize. i apologize. i'm coming at you way too hard. i'm sorry. >> fred, i just want you to know, i preordered "house of pinecones" backstage and i can not wait. i'm psyched about it. >> seth: that's really exciting. >> fred: thank you. >> seth: i'm sorry, i didn't ask. how many episodes? >> fred: 27. [ laughter ] >> seth: it's really good. >> 27. all 27 episodes i preordered.
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>> seth: with your show, is there anybody left that you are excited to see? like, when you're there, is there somebody -- >> oh, i think everybody. i get really, i mean, i like celebrities. i think that you can't host a talk show if you don't. >> seth: right, yeah. >> i mean, i really like to see movie stars in person. i think that jennifer lopez is the most exciting celebrity. when she walks into a -- yes, you can applaud j-lo. [ cheers and applause ] >> seth: yes, she is fascinating. >> yeah. she -- you know i wore a big ball gown and i had my hair and makeup done. and you know, you think you look really pretty. i'm like, yeah, i'm turning it up tonight, because it's the academy awards. and then j-lo comes back and you're like, i am hideous. i am a monster. [ laughter ] >> seth: she is something else. >> j-lo, let me hand you your champagne! [ applause ] >> seth: and even to you she's like, "i will not do your show, monster." >> step away, monster. >> seth: i don't care what time it is. you had a birthday party for your son, joaquin, yesterday. >> joaquin, yes, yesterday. >> seth: and you took him to laser tag? >> laser tag. >> seth: now, this is nice, i like this.
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he turned 12. >> he turned 12, so this is -- he's really into pac-man right now. he plays it on my ipad. and so we got on a pac-man cake, but this is a cookie monster cupcake, which was -- his first birthday, he had a cookie monster cupcake and we give him one every year and we make him re-create the frosting picture. because when he was one, he had never eaten anything like that before. and it was just everywhere, frosting all over his face. >> seth: and so that explains this. >> that explains that, yeah. >> seth: okay, gotcha. >> yeah, he doesn't have a problem with food. [ laughter ] >> seth: because i saw this one first and i didn't know how to break it to you. that at 12, you should be able to eat without getting stuff all over your -- >> right, you should be able to get the food in your mouth. we sort of make him re-create the moment for us. >> seth: this is a party, the oscars were a party, another awards show that's a bit of a party and takes place in d.c. is the white house correspondents dinner, which you've also been to. >> yes. >> seth: now, how many times have you gone? >> i've only gone once. >> seth: okay. >> you've hosted it right? >> seth: i hosted it once, it was the only time i went. >> and tell me, what was that like for you, because i was sweating the whole night just being there.
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>> seth: it was nerve-racking. the nice thing -- i mean mostly just telling jokes next to the president, about the president, i wouldn't recommend. >> right. [ laughter ] >> seth: you know? this is the best country to do it in, i will say that. [ laughter ] >> right. >> seth: of the countries. >> it is, that's right. of all the countries. [ applause ] >> seth: but, the nice thing about hosting is i don't have to go through all the crazy security. and that was -- the friends of mine who came to the show, my parents, said it was the worst. was that your experience with it? >> oh sweetie -- okay, so i show up, and i'm again, you know, i'm dressed up. i have a gown on. i have this little clutch. and women's clutches at awards shows really are, it's like they're giving us the middle finger. >> seth: yeah. >> because it is a bag that carries nothing. >> seth: yeah. it's just smaller than a phone. >> it's just small -- too small for a phone, too small for a stick of gum. but anyway, so we're going through the press line. and, i mean, the security line. and i have to pass through. and then they say can you open
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your purse. and i open my purse and with some hydraulic force. i don't know what made it happen. a tampon shoots 12 feet into the air. [ laughter ] you can tell that at first people think it's something sketchy. and then they're like, it's just a tampon. it's just a tampon. [ laughter ] >> seth: stand down! stand down! [ applause ] >> just kotex security. you know. and then there was one of the editors of "the washington post" was there and he introduces himself and he says, "this is the greatest thing i've ever seen here." [ laughter ] >> seth: i like that it's like the new jack-in-the-box clutch. >> yeah, it was like -- oh, look party favors. and then you try to walk away, like it's not yours. >> seth: right. they're like "miss ripa!" >> right. >> seth: "miss ripa!" >> your tampon! [ laughter ] you're kotex security tampon. >> seth: and you sign all your tampons right, so they knew it
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was yours. >> i do, i do. >> seth: well, there you go. >> you never know when you're going to drain a lake. [ laughter ] >> seth: thank you so much for that final image. >> you're welcome. >> seth: and thank you so much for being here. kelly ripa, everybody! "live with kelly and michael" airs weekdays in syndication. we'll be right back with lee daniels. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ bacon?!
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gotta get that bacon! yummy, crunchy, bacon bacon bacon there in that bag! who wants a beggin' strip? me! i'd get it myself, but i don't have thumbs! mmm mmm mmm mmm mmm it's beggin'! mmm, i love you. (announcer) beggin' strips...there's no time like beggin' time. iand i'm jerry bell the third. i'm like a big bear and he's my little cub. this little guy is non-stop. he's always hanging out with his friends. you've got to be prepared to sit at the edge of your seat and be ready to get up. there's no "deep couch sitting." definitely not good for my back. this is the part i really don't like right here. (doorbell) what's that? a package! it's a swiffer wetjet. it almost feels like it's moving itself. this is kind of fun. that comes from my floor? eww! this is deep couch sitting. [jerry bell iii] deep couch sitting! ...don't break up with the witphone you love.... can you imagine? running into your old phone... ...after you get a new phone? awkward.
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uh, mine's easier. get a load of jack's loaded breakfast sandwich. what's on it? what's not on it? it's like a big ol' breakfast buffet right in your hand. ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> seth: welcome back to "late night," everybody. our next guest is an academy award nominated director whose films include "lee daniels' the butler" and "precious." he's one of the creators of the smash hit tv show "empire" which airs wednesday nights on fox. let's take a look. >> luscious! >> hi, grandma. >> hi, baby, where your grandfather? luscious! luscious! luscious. she playing you. >> excuse me? we are in the middle of planning my wedding. >> excuse me! you were in the middle of getting your ass gone. >> you too. >> fake ass jackie o. kick rocks! it's family business. >> what are you doing? >> she working with beretti.
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yeah, while you were up in here planning a wedding, this bitch planning how to steal everything you got, which is everything i got. and i'm not finna let that happen. tell 'em boo boo kitty. >> um, she, she, i, didn't -- >> uh-uh, oh oh, she, she, boo boo, boo. oh now you can't speak english! please welcome lee daniels. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> seth: well, man, congratulations. this is so exciting. your show is so great. >> thank you. >> seth: the ratings are unprecedented. >> now, i've got a confession to make. >> seth: yes. >> i got to get it off me. >> seth: great. >> okay, this is a -- my boyfriend was so nervous about me coming here tonight. >> seth: why is that? >> because i had a crush on you. [ cheers and applause ] >> seth: oh great. great. be nervous. stay nervous. >> and then i found out --
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and then i found out you got a wife and everything. and i said, "shut up, he's another one bites the dust." [ laughter ] >> seth: well, i'm glad that settled your boyfriend. [ laughter ] and this show is so great. did you expect this at all? and if so, why? why is this show working as well as it is? >> you know -- it's just about telling the truth. i didn't think anybody was going to see this show. i didn't think anybody was going to see "precious," you know? i didn't think anybody was going to see "monster's ball." i didn't think anybody was going to see "butler." i think that -- i think that the networks and the studios and the media underestimate the intelligence of the american public. that, you know, that we, that they want to see the truth. and my mama says, the truth will set you free. >> seth: it was originally brought as a screen play. yes? >> no, no, my partner danny strong. not my boyfriend, but my partner, my writing partner. >> seth: yes. >> he wrote "the butler." and he said, "lee, let's do something. let's continue on. what's up next?" and i said, uh --
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and he pitched "lion in the winter." >> seth: yeah, great peter o'toole, katharine hepburn movie. >> yeah, and i said, "oh okay. but let's do -- let's do it hip-hop and let's do it --" no, he said, "let's do it hip-hop." and i said, "let's do it for tv." and he goes, "why not a film?" i said, "'cause i want to make some money for once." >> seth: right, yeah. enough of that messing around. >> because, yeah, you know we'd been to the oscars and the golden globes. and, you know, we end up right back where we were at square one, starting, scratching for dollars, dialing for dollars for the next movie. >> seth: now you're doing a network television show, and it's not that the show isn't shocking, because every thursday our staff comes in and people say, "can you believe what happened last night on 'empire'?" >> really? >> seth: absolutely. >> oh, man, that makes me feel good. >> seth: absolutely. [ applause ] but have you found, because again you've worked in film where it's less constricting. has network television been constricting for you with what you can and can't do? [ laughter ] a little bit, maybe?
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>> i'm bound and gagged. >> seth: you're bound and gagged. >> and handcuffed. >> seth: but you're getting away with it. >> you know what it is, but it helps me -- well, two things. it was important for me to go into network television, because i had the option of doing cable or network. and i decided prime-time, because i wanted my family to see it. and a lot of my family can't afford cable. so it was really important for them to see my story, our story, on prime-time. and also it helps me creatively. you know what i mean? >> seth: not being able -- having things you can't do. >> yeah, because on cable i could do, i could say whatever. how do you tell a story about hip-hop without using some of those words? >> seth: yeah. >> do you know what i mean? the poetry is the language and the language is the music. and the music is the magic. so what i do is we work, the actors really do the work with nuance, with glances. and those glances say those words. >> seth: well, that's the thing, as you say that i think back to the great clip we just saw of
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taraji and i'm like, "wait, no that's right, she didn't swear there." but, you feel like you hear them, because of her performance. >> yeah, it's 'cause it's bubbling. it's all in the acting. >> seth: you've had incredible guest stars, in your first season. mary j. blige was here. she was talking about being on your show. you had courtney love, jennifer hudson. now that this show is -- >> cuba gooding. >> seth: cuba gooding, that's a good one. >> yeah, it's great. >> seth: and now are people wanting -- >> naomi campbell. >> seth: great, as well, are people coming for season two already? >> oh, everybody's coming. >> seth: everybody, okay. >> everybody, everybody. i'm waiting for obama to call me. [ laughter ] >> seth: right, that'll be good! >> he may not call! at the first episode we did a little number about him. >> seth: i would love -- i want obama, but i don't want him to play obama. i want him to play like one of cookie's exes. >> oh, yes! [ laughter ] >> seth: that's the move. that's the move. [ laughter ] >> what would his name be? >> seth: well, yeah, you tell me. "uh, cookie, i'm back." that's what i think he'll say. [ laughter ] "i'm back cookie." what do you think? >> teddy mcfadden. >> seth: teddy mcfadden.
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yeah, and he was in a boy band back in the day. but, like one of those, you know, like color me -- like you know, one of those groups. >> yeah. >> seth: and then king comes back for cookie. anyways, it's writing itself, i think this is really good. [ laughter ] >> you're not getting a cut. >> seth: no, i get it. you made that very clear. i saw a photo of you. you were wearing pajamas and it was not at night and it was not from your bedroom. it was you were publicly wearing pajamas. and then i've heard -- i then did some follow-up work to make sure you hadn't just wandered out of a hospital. you actually direct i n your pajamas. is this true? >> i do direct in my pajamas. >> seth: okay, so how did this come about? >> i don't really think about it. i just sort of do it. and i've always directed in my pajamas. i was overweight. i lost like 60 pounds. [ applause ] thank you very much. and so that was the primary reason, but you know, it was just free. i was able to do my thing. but i still direct in my pajamas
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after losing the weight. i just go ahead and tail it in because it liberates me. i sleep, breathe, eat work. and so i go from the bed to the, you know -- i rarely wash. >> seth: you've directed -- >> oprah. >> seth: you've directed oprah. that's what i was going to say. how does oprah act when somebody is telling her what to do who didn't even have the courtesy to put on pants? >> when she first saw it, when she first looked at me, she's just like -- i said, "shut up, sit down, say your line." [ laughter ] >> seth: you did that to oprah? that's a big deal, yeah. that i guess is why you go into directing. is that you can tell oprah what to do. >> well not, well yeah. >> seth: just that one time. >> yeah. >> seth: congratulations again on the show. i'm so happy for you. keep it going. >> thank you, sir. >> seth: lee daniels, everybody. >> thank you so much. >> seth: new episodes of "empire" air wednesday night on fox. we'll be right back with music from echosmith. [ cheers and applause ] ♪
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>> seth: welcome back, everybody. my next guests are a band of musical siblings from l.a. here to perform "bright", please welcome echosmith. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ i think the universe is on my side heaven and earth have finally aligned ♪ ♪ days are good and that's the way it should be ♪ ♪ you sprinkle stars on my pillow case it's like a moonbeam brushed across my face ♪ ♪ nights are good and that's the way it should be ♪ ♪ you make me sing oh la la la ♪
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you make a girl go oh i'm in love ♪ ♪ did you see that shooting star tonight were you dazzled by the same constellation ♪ ♪ did you and jupiter conspire to get me i think you and the moon and neptune got it right ♪ ♪ 'cause now i'm shining bright so bright ♪ ♪ bright so bright ♪ ♪ and i see colors in a different way you make what doesn't matter fade to gray ♪ ♪ life is good and that's the way it should be ♪ ♪ you make me sing oh la la la
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you make a girl go oh i'm in love love ♪ ♪ did you see that shooting star tonight were you dazzled by the same constellation ♪ ♪ did you and jupiter conspire to get me i think you and the moon and neptune got it right ♪ ♪ 'cause now i'm shining bright so bright ♪ and i get lost in your eyes ♪ ♪ did you see that shooting star tonight were you dazzled by the same constellation ♪ ♪ did you and jupiter conspire to get me i think you and the moon and neptune got it right ♪
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♪ 'cause now i'm shining bright so bright ♪ ♪ bright so bright bright so bright ♪ ♪ and i get lost in your eyes tonight ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> seth: echosmith. the album, "talking dreams", available now. we'll be right back. [ cheers and applause ]
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[ cheers and applause ] >> seth: my thanks to kelly ripa, lee daniels, echosmith, everybody. kate pierson and, of course, the 8g band. stay tuned for carson daly. we'll see you tomorrow. [ cheers and applause ]
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♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪
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♪ >> carson: good evening and welcome to "last call." i'm carson daly. tonight, we're coming to you from the world famous kroq studios here in los angeles. i do a little radio show out of here from time to time. so, 's good to be doing the late night show here. tonight, we got a great line-up from top to bottom. in our oscar spotlight, "song of the seas" tomm moore is here. for music, gap dream makes their tv debut from the troubadour. but right now, we're going to kick it off and go to los property bar and sit down with game-changing film maker, spike lee. some of his notable credits, of course, include "do the right thing," "malcolm x," "bamboozled" and "inside man."


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